Independence Day

Dear Scots, or Scotch, Scotlanders, People of Scotland.. let's not get bogged down in minutiae, eh?

Here comes the vote! Crikey, I'm nearly as excited as you all seem to be. I do love Scotland, and its people (well, nearly all of them). Then there's the countryside: grand, sweeping glens with mountains rearing in the background and salmon leaping from the glimmering loch into your net.. okay, I got carried away a bit there.

I'll cut to the chase: I really hope you vote YES on Thursday. The main reason for that is that I've always regarded Scotland as an independent country anyway. On our many visits (certainly not enough of those, but still a good number - including our honeymoon), the whole experience has been as far from England as you could hope to be without suffering culture shock. Friendly, engaging locals. Good beer (and I hear you're catching up now). And, back to the vistas: those lochs, mountains, valleys - all clad in green and red and gold. Or the drive North from Ullapool, in the rain, with granite glinting everywhere. Or trekking on Harris, seeing nobody for days as you just wander the vast spaces, pausing in awe as another fantastic view presents itself over a ridge.

It doesn't sound like England.

Okay, a lot of 'Yes' votes will be from those disaffected with the current Government in Westminster. And people will say, "You shouldn't make such a major decision on the basis of hating the current Government". But that's silly, because the previous Governments have been just as unlikeable, and have treated anyone outside the Home Counties with utter contempt anyway. Admittedly, even the Home Counties are out of the loop now, but still - being governed arrogantly from hundreds of miles away is never going to be an edifying experience, is it?

Another good reason to vote 'Yes' is the general ineptitude of the 'No' - sorry, 'Better Together', keep it positive - campaign. From wheeling out ex-Scottish celebrities to shoving David Cameron himself in your faces, they can't seem to find an angle that isn't instantly dismissable. When Tony Blair at last threw his hat into the ring - presumably after the Treasury agreed his fee - and exhorted you to not vote for independence, the deal was sealed: nobody's going to do what Tony asks, are they? These people must be on another planet.

The campaigns themselves have been interesting, because nobody has a bloody clue what will actually happen if you vote for independence on Thursday. So the 'No' camp have been able to threaten anything they can think up: economic paralysis, stagnation of the jobs market, and (just recently) an increased risk of terrorism. Um, isn't that statement itself terrorism, technically? By contrast, the 'Yes' camp have to keep their promises realistic to avoid ridicule. But I think that many voters have seen through this, and now every new doom-laden prophecy (delivered in a strictly-neutral way by the BBC, *cough*) just puts another nail in the 'No' camp's coffin.

Finally, the 'No' campaign have such a negative message. They may have hastily rebranded to 'Better Together', but most of the posters I've seen for the movement have had 'NO' in big letters. It's not exactly a rallying cry that people can write songs around, is it?

So, best of luck on Thursday. Many of us England-types are rooting for you. And I'm only slightly nervous: because for decades, I've said that if Scotland ever gained independence, I'd move there. And my Mum won't be happy about that..

Hangers and other monopurposed products

Over the years, I've developed a strong mistrust - perhaps even a dislike - of clothes hangers. It took me a while to recognise this, seeing as it wasn't affecting my social discourse, my work, or my sleeping patterns. But slowly, I began to anaylse how I felt, and why - realising that I felt the same way about certain other things as well.

The term I will use for these items is monopurposed. What I mean to imply is that these products have been designed to perform a specific function, which they usually do well. It doesn't sound too bad so far, does it?

The problems arise when a designer not only prioritises, but also obsesses about, the stated purpose, to the exclusion of all other considerations. Because most products - perhaps all products - will have 'down time'. Times when their particular purpose is not realised or needed.

Empty hangers.

They are a nightmare. They are noisy, they jangle and tangle and clatter and fall. And have you ever tried to pack up a pile of hangers to, for instance, move house? Aha-ha-ha-ha-ha. That doesn't go well.

Of course, like most families we've accumulated hangers over the years. They arrive with new clothes, and in packs of five or so from stores. So, many variants jostle for position on the rails. Simple moulded plastic arms (no trouser bar) are probably the best - the lack of a closed loop minimises tangles (unless the hook is in play). But we, like many people, have hangers of different configurations, sizes, and even top hook sizes. They will jump over each other even on the hanging rails.

When I creep to bed, trying not to disturb my already-sleeping companion, I can guarantee noisy hangers.

Of course, it's not just hangers. We have a rucksac, passed on by a friend. It's a very good quality rucksac, and the perfect size for a solo trek of a few days. It has a back system that curves inwards, so you don't get a sweaty spine, and is in general a pleasure to use.

Then, you take it off, and realise it is monopurposed. It won't stand up. It won't even agree which side to lay on. It won't stay propped against a wall or tree. It trips you up, snags you. The designers gave no thought at all to how it would be once you took it off.

Then there are useful items that suffer from not having a simple hanging loop or hole. Tea towels, saucepans, even some coats.

I now look for such features when shopping. And I spend a little part of each day trying to re-imagine clothes hangers. You never know.

Inaugural post purporting to be an introduction

This cannot be happening. Who begins a blog in 2014?

Years and years and years ago, I created a blog ('Naval Gazing', I think I called it). I never posted to it, forgot about it, and now I can't find any mention of it in any email. There is a blog of that name on Blogger, but it ain't mine. So I've started a new one.

This blog will be a brain dump. A better title might have been, 'Big Things and Small Things', but that was taken. As were the many others I tried, before striking gold with the current name.

It is, after all, research. 'It' being everything. Data acquisition, assimilation, production. Reading a book, watching the telly, arguing in the pub. Your brain is an eager researcher, even if it only publishes gibberish when you try and get information back out of it.

I'm going to post whenever I feel the urge. It may be about good things, or bad things. Small things or big things. Probably including hangers and fracking.

I promised to make tea at 10pm, so I'd better pop downstairs and get the kettle on. Be seeing you.